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note to self

September 25, 2007 at 8:31 pm | Posted in my desktop | Leave a comment
Tags: cats, dogs, pet food

remix struggleburger – chewing gum with my mouth open

BiPolar Bear

August 2, 2007 at 4:18 pm | Posted in mental health journal, my desktop | Leave a comment

I have had a lot of problems with control …. But I can convey this

to you…

Lows are followed by Highs and the If you can keep highs in control..

the lows will be better … It is ok to sleep but only for hour or so during

the day…

To control Lows you must do something you enjoy … If this

happens your highs will be in control… with Medication… too …

Lows will come not so low and there again you should keep active

only with thinks that keep your mind from running top speed…

Hope this will help you… It is a battle but well worth the work

it takes…

Grandpa … Glenn

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June 9, 2007 at 11:45 pm | Posted in mental health journal, my desktop | Leave a comment

4:30pm MAW, MHW, came tyo family froup. and visited from 2p to 4:30pm Also EHW brought his old Birkenstocks asa well as two poloi shirts 6 ice mountain spring waters, Kurt Vonnegut’s the Sirens of Titan, and most importantly, Philip K. Dick’s

VALIS

which is his exegisis, much of which was written during the author’s extended stay in a mental health facility sucha s this pone. It is autobiographical and a perfect counterpoint to TIMEQUAKE.

It is also the most appropriate book to read while in a facility of this kind.

PKD was crazy. He took thousands of amphetamine pills. He was also genius. Twentyfive years after his death his works are more relevent than ever (plus you sure can make a killer movie screenplay out of him). I believe wholeheartedly thtat decades from now PKD will be seen as a prophet of the MENTAL HEALTH ENVIRONMENT, as high literature, as roman a clef fiction, and not as sci-fi pulp.

page 1

June 9, 2007 at 11:24 pm | Posted in mental health journal, my desktop | Leave a comment

5/20

2007

1pm

Talked with Vjay after lunch.

An Argentine supporter, his favorite team is (Maradona’s ) BOCA Juniors. Grr.

In the 4th grade I dedicated my support

to the Red and White of RIVER PLATE ,

an entirely arbitrary decision which has arbitrarily created a conflict, however trivial, between my closest peer in this facility and myself.

At least he’s no ROMAnisto.

Vijay is one of many fascinating characters in this locked down facility. The dozen or so I have interacted with have given me endlesss food for thought as to the nature of my own insanity.

Only two people on the UNIT can truly be considered certifiably bonkers:

1.) Anna G, ex-stripper, porn star, and groupie, whose psychosis is typical of that sort of female. (see Jessica Silottto).

2.) Diana, who has suffered some sort of amnesia. she is the nice sort of crazy. I helped her locate her clearly labelled room this morning.

Despite their insanity, or perhaps on account of it, I value these characters opinions MORE

erin is as crazy as I am

May 28, 2007 at 4:39 pm | Posted in f1, gbs, my desktop, tns | Leave a comment

Sh1shKaBaby: http://www.scubb.com/images/products/PC%20momo%20racing%20force%20SW%20LT_box.jpg
Sh1shKaBaby: i need this.
Sh1shKaBaby: hm..
ahw00: oh god yes ahw00: get me one too ahw00: then we can race
Sh1shKaBaby: haha. too bad they’re 100 bucks.
ahw00: I would take one with less buttons ahw00: for less money
Sh1shKaBaby: i’ve spent the last day and a half rebuilding my computer in order to need for speed carbon to run properly.
ahw00: baller
Sh1shKaBaby: *for
ahw00: we honestly do need to race
16:23
Sh1shKaBaby: haha. go buy the game. along with a dvd drive. and a joy stick of some kind.
ahw00: dl’ing now
Sh1shKaBaby: unless you feel like using arrow keys.
ahw00: I have a ps2 style gamepad
Sh1shKaBaby: you’re downloading nfs carbon?
ahw00: which works pretty well
ahw00: yeah its 2.83GB
Sh1shKaBaby: sweeeet.
Sh1shKaBaby: that sounds about right.
ahw00: dvd
Sh1shKaBaby: dude. we can have our own guild thing.
Sh1shKaBaby: online. and be badasses.
ahw00: oh yeahzzzzzz
Sh1shKaBaby: you have to have some sort of fucking device thing.
ahw00: I have all kinds of devices
Sh1shKaBaby: ATI or something that’s not intel.
Sh1shKaBaby: it says on the box.
Sh1shKaBaby: i just don’t remember what it says.
ahw00: ati radeon 9000 which is pretty old but should do the trick
Sh1shKaBaby: yeah.
ahw00: it ran the older need for speed: shiny edition game
Sh1shKaBaby: hm..
Sh1shKaBaby: i think it will. i could go look if i really needed to.
ahw00: well I will find out once I dl another 2.82GBs of shininess
Sh1shKaBaby: but not, we bought a sound card because it had a game controller adapter in it.
Sh1shKaBaby: so i could use my old skool nascar steering wheel.
ahw00: awyeaz
ahw00: that excites me
Sh1shKaBaby: but it doesn’t friggin work.
ahw00: we can fix it
Sh1shKaBaby: because it’s not USB.
ahw00: damn
ahw00: serial?
ahw00: I have a serial -> usb dealie
Sh1shKaBaby: i dunno. i assume so.
Sh1shKaBaby: i’m just gonna go buy one.
ahw00: is it like an old printer hookup sortof
Sh1shKaBaby: they’re like.. 90 bucks at fry’s.
ahw00: k well don’t throw away the old one because I can use it
Sh1shKaBaby: kay.
Sh1shKaBaby: it still works, just not for what i want it for.
ahw00: and then we can dominate the mean internet streets like the internet mexicans we are
Sh1shKaBaby: yesss
ahw00: fcuk 2.83gb is the xbox360 version
ahw00: the full dvd is 3.96 ahh this will take a while
Sh1shKaBaby: hah. it’s hella big.
Sh1shKaBaby: it takes forever to load just to start up.
ahw00: yeah I’ve been working on my desktop for like 18hrs straight just getting things cleaned up and reformatted
ahw00: bc my laptop is dead
Sh1shKaBaby: i need to do that.
Sh1shKaBaby: and delete a bunch of stuff.
Sh1shKaBaby: what’d you do to it?
ahw00: nothing it just had a way too powerful processor in it which overheated all the time and I think blew out the power supply
ahw00: which is replaceable but would require a trip to fry’s
Sh1shKaBaby: i need to go there anyway.
ahw00: well hey
Sh1shKaBaby: to get my steering wheel.
Sh1shKaBaby: do you have money?
ahw00: $2.25 + ($paycheck tomorrow-$160 ticket) + ($51 other check tomorrow) = not really\
Sh1shKaBaby: hah. sucks.
ahw00: but if need for speed runs on this here desktop I have everything I need
Sh1shKaBaby: sweeet.
Sh1shKaBaby: how are you downloading it?
ahw00: including a clicky clicky IBM keyboard like your dad has a closet full of
ahw00: bittorrent
ahw00: http://thepiratebay.org/tor/3630472/%5BPC-Game%5DNeed_for_Speed_Carbon_-_Edition_Razor_1911.iso
Sh1shKaBaby: sweet.
Sh1shKaBaby: yeah. he’s got closets full of everything.
ahw00: your dad is pretty much my hero btw
Sh1shKaBaby: he had that ATI thing just sitting on a shelf.
16:33
Sh1shKaBaby: haha he’s awesome.
Sh1shKaBaby: my brother’s the same way.
Sh1shKaBaby: i decided not to be a computer geek for the rest of my life. i’d probably be pretty good at it tho.
Sh1shKaBaby: dude. i’m hungry.
ahw00: me tooo
Sh1shKaBaby: i’m going to go eat and go to fry’s. let me know when/if nfs works.
ahw00: k
Sh1shKaBaby: and we’ll rule the internet.
Sh1shKaBaby: because i’m kind of scared to play against people.
ahw00: will do I’ll get on that
Sh1shKaBaby: real, live people.
ahw00: real live mexican people
Sh1shKaBaby: haha.
ahw00: it’s not like your machismo is at stake or anything
Sh1shKaBaby: rela live gamer people who do nothing but sit around and play nfs carbon.
ahw00: likely
Sh1shKaBaby: *real
ahw00: except they are all on xbox360 the mexicans are the ones dl’ing 4GB dvd images so they don’t have to spend any money
Sh1shKaBaby: yeah.
Sh1shKaBaby: okay well.. i’ll be back.
Sh1shKaBaby: toodles.
ahw00: (because they only have 500 pesos)
ahw00: later!